lovesexdrugs';

Do you remember that night we slept on the back deck at my aunts house? Under the stars cuddled together in my blanket. How we layed there and talked. Amongst other things.
Do you remember our very first fight? How after only one week I was going to give up, but I didn’t.. Cause you wouldn’t let me, you fought for me. We cried together that night and told each other things that only brought us closer, and made us trust each other even more.
Do you remember how we used to look at each other, how you always wanted to see me smile? Like it was one of your favourite things about me. You always asked to see me smile, used to tell me I was beautiful. Do you remember how scared we were to love each other.. How we thought we were but weren’t sure.. But we both knew we wanted to be with each other, and that we were happy?
Do you remember why you fell for me?
Do you remember how it felt to tell each other I love you?
Do you remember what being happy with me is?
Do you remember any of who we were?
Do you remember the love we used to have?
For fuck sakes.. Do you remember any of it?

I know things are between us have change dramatically, and it breaks me down to pieces. But we’re going to be ohkay, you and I together happy somehow, we just have to get through this step by step. You seem to be the only one who really truly understands me, and I need you in my life. Even if no one does want us together. Your the one that picks me up, if for any reason I fall. I love you baby, this is going to work out.

I can see it in your eyes, the tears you won’t let fall. The pain you refuse to show, because your scared someone will see it as weakness. I know you cry all alone in your room when there’s no one there to watch. I see your sad, and i can even see your angry. You probably think your losing it, and wish it would all end. Or wish someone could understand for a moment what its been like for you. Wish that for one moment someone could step into your life, and see why your always blocking people out, why you don’t let people get close enough to hear you. I know that loneliness, that darkness. But its ohkay, your not alone. I feel it too, all of it. The burning of your eyes from tears you could not stop, the aching in your chest from all the heartbreak, being so emotionally unstable from all the times someone misguided your trust. I know it all, but hanging in there darling eventually things will be alright, just stay strong and keep your head up. your just as beautiful as anyone else.

I’m just the average teenage girl, trying to find where I belong in this crazy world.
It’s not easy, this world we grow up in, there’s always something out there waiting to harm you in some way. You have all those people smiling in your face, just waiting to stab you in the back.. Those strangers on the street who’s heart and soul has been damaged in so many ways, they’ve turned cold, all the greed. It’s all quite disturbing, what we as people have become.. filled with hate, and manipulative ways, and ignorance towards other people. Who are we to trust? Who can we really run to in every time of need? I have become so confused on things i used to know, so lost..
My mind is constantly skipping .. flashing back and forth. Things that made sense, don’t. Have i just completely lost it? or is this really average… Am i just the average person we see on the street everyday? or have i gone insane, or better yet, sane. Have the people around me completely lost their sanity? Who’s to say who’s, who? and yet we do it everyday, make a judgement towards other people.. Thats how all these little groups start.. all these titles, your either this or your that. no in between. Is that realistic, or fair? Being given a label because of how you talk, or dress, or personal hobbies? We don’t have to wear a label, we are all people, all very different and unique in many ways.